A day in the life of a transwoman and her genitals

An article about how modern comedy does disservice to trans people.

I look at my experience with other people’s perceptions of bisexuality

Even more things about being trans in the UK. Gotta love a list,

*sigh* more farcical UKIP-age… go on, it’s good for a giggle.

My latest wordpress entry.

I have transferred to Wordpress…

here is the link to my new blog

http://thewriterstransition.wordpress.com/

I have been transferring the highlights of this blog over to the new one, and I will continue to promote my writing on tumblr, however WP is more interactive and user friendly, so please bookmark and share my new URL.

I look forward to seeing you all over there

Regards

Tamz

Tammy and the pain in the fat ass eating disorder

Thank you Tumblr for deciding to delete the text from my previous post. It doesn’t matter that I was writhing in emotional distress writing such a heartfelt piece about how I feel that I have no control over my compulsive eating or my autopilot binging. It obviously make no difference that I was relating one of the darkest, most painful manifestations of my rock bottom self-esteem and the very worst side of my Gender Dysphoria. It doesn’t matter that I have spent all day trying to work out how best to put something that I have been aching to talk about. Nah, just go and fuck up like what I say means nothing…

Appreciate it…

really…

…BASTARD!!!!

Tamz xXx

regularlyschedulednegativity:

tamlynmac:

regularlyschedulednegativity:

the-unpopular-opinions:

SELF FULFILLING PROPHECY:
When you believe something will happen, and inadvertently bring about that outcome through your own actions.
SJWs: We’re oppressed!!!!!!!
Rest of the world: No, you’re not.
SJWs: You’re trying to downplay and derail our pain!!!!!!
Rest of the world: No, we’re not.
SJWs: You just plain hate us!!!!!!
Rest of the world: Yeah, I guess we do hate you now, since you can’t stop whining and flapping your gums about “systematic oppression” that doesn’t exist, and instead just suffer in silence like the rest of us. It’s called life. And life’s not fair. Get used to it.
SJWs: SEE?!?!?! YOU DO HATE US! WE WERE RIGHT!  WE ARE OPPRESSED!!!!!!!!!!!
You are not oppressed.
You are not “systematically” oppressed.
You’re hated for your stupid and whiny views, but you’re not oppressed.
You are not comparing apples and oranges when you say “men’s problems,” or “straight peoples’ problems,” etc are nothing compared to your own, and doing so doesn’t earn your “cause” any sympathy. Everyone’s problems deserve attention, great or small. You’ve got problems? Get in line! We’ve all got problems.
You live in a free society. You have the exact same rights and get the exact same pay as every straight white male out there. If you choose to work in a non-STEM field, don’t blame “patriarchy” for your lack of motivation and smaller paycheck. If you don’t get a job, don’t blame racism or sexism because you wrote a crappy resume.
In fact, employers are now afraid to hire the straight white male for fear of being labeled “discriminatory” for not hiring the gay hispanic female.
If anything, you have an ADVANTAGE by playing the race/gender/whatever discrimination card.
You don’t want to be treated the same as a straight white male. You want to be treated a whole lot better than him. You blame him for your problems, and don’t just want to be equal to him, but to bring him low, thinking you’re getting even for “years of systematic oppression.” You’re only going to hurt your cause in the end. You’re just too angry to admit it.

This is perfect. Only a fool would disagree with this post!

All I see is another whiny kid banging on about things he knows nothing about. If you had half a brain, you would understand why the minority card exists, and that is because certain people are reticent to be seen as engaging in the culture of double standards that it is prevalent. The fact that the minority card exists is enough to disprove your premise that there is no oppression.
Take for example the fact that women who get raped are often disbelieved as default or that women who are sexually harassed are frequently told to just ‘stop whining’ and take it as a joke/compliment/job opportunity. Women who endure sexual assaults are made to stand up in court and have their character pulled apart to see whether they were ‘asking for it’. Men in the same circumstances are not. Now, do women feel that a guy holding a door for them or offering to buy them a drink is in somehow a fair trade for this oppressive attitude towards women?  Is it bollocks!!!
It is the same with ethnicity. There are legitimate political organisations in this country who promote intolerance towards anyone who isn’t white and British. I grew up in an area where the word ‘Paki’ was the byword for anyone of Asian descent, with no regard for how degrading and offensive it was, where the idea of ‘Paki-bashing’ was considered a hilarious pastime, and where people thought it acceptable to harass any non-white person in the street because they were in the neighbourhood but not delivering food. I fail to see how a few laws that say you can’t discriminate against someone’s race or ethnicity somehow puts them in a position of privilege over white Brits
These laws that everyone cites as giving preference to minority groups in terms of employment are a ridiculous exaggeration of anti-discrimination legislation by people who are bitter that other groups of people might get a fair chance at a job, or fair representation in a court of law or in government. The same people who use the phrase ‘I’m not racist, but…’ are invariably the people who would rather see an all white house of commons and police force.
To say that oppression does not exist in our society is naive at best, dangerously revisionist at worst. Yes, the world gets a little better with each passing generation, but a few baby steps towards equality does not solve the problems of inherent bigotry in society.
We minority types aren’t looking to take over the world, all we want is the same level of respect and consideration as everybody else. Do we want special treatment ? No, we want EQUAL treatment. We want to be able to walk down the street without fear of being attacked for our race, ethnicity, sex or gender identity, the way that people who aren’t in minority groups can. We want to be able to go for a job interview or to patronise a business without someone taking one look at us and refusing to deal with us.
What we want is the same right to live unharassed, unmarginalised and unafraid of violence for who we are. And you know what? If we see or experience anything that contravenes those simple requests, then we will shout and scream and kick up a fuss, because just lying there and taking it doesn’t make it go away. The Suffragettes, The Civil Rights Movement, Stonewall… these groups have made huge differences in the lives of everyone in pushing for a fairer and more tolerant society. Please tell me why exactly you think some groups of people deserve to just lie there and get kicked more than others?
By denouncing someone just for speaking up for themselves in the face of injustice or abuse, all you are doing is siding with those who want the injustice or abuse to continue… the small minded and shallow hearted who wish to cling to their own privilege at the expense of everyone else out of some desperate attempt to feel naturally superior to someone. You want to stand up against double standards and inequality? Stop apologising for racists, mysogynists, homophobes, transphobes and xenophobes and pull your head out from your backside.
I have never been in a position where pulling my minority card would have been to my advantage, either legally or socially, yet I have been in many situations where my minority status has resulted in abuse, threats, public ridicule and denial of basic courtesies. The minority card won’t protect you when you are having the shit kicked out of you, or trying to win over a police officer or jury when you claim someone has attacked you. The minority card ultimately buys you nothing, and so I never play it, and most people in minorities feel the same way. We have a septic, venomous media that seeks to blame minority groups for the problems of the country, as opposed to the extravagances and incompetence of a tiny, super-rich, non-compassionate elite, and it works so well because people would rather take a second to hate, than ten seconds to learn and understand.

You’ve not properly read OP’s post. It doesn’t say there is no oppression, it says that the oppression is caused by whiny kids, the description of which matches your opening sentence. What minority groups seem to forget is that, yes, while they have the right to live unharnessed, so do I, and others like me. I have only to go on Tumblr for ten minutes before receiving abuse about my privilege from people who know nothing about me - if they did, they would know I do not have it easy in the slightest. Assumption is part of the problem. Don’t assume that my life is perfect. Don’t assume that I or any other white/cis/male have it easier than you. Your final statement actually summarises my point (not OPs - I can’t speak for anyone else)- “people would rather hate than learn to understand”.

Oh I have read it and I did not misunderstand. While there may be a few  obnoxious kids on Tumblr, it is hardly indicative of the real world where certain people face extensive obstacles they would not were they not of whatever minority status. To make out that kicking up a fuss about one’s treatment as a minority somehow makes one deserving of that treatment is a symptom of a sick society that I’m sure no one in their right mind would truly want to live in. The key to breaking a cycle of victim blaming and lashing out at one another is to not perpetuate it. I never assumed that your life is perfect. I never assume that of anybody, but the OP states that…
"If anything, you have an ADVANTAGE by playing the race/gender/whatever discrimination card."
Basically that minority status bestows great privilege, not on Tumblr, but in the real world. I live in the real world, and being trans has never opened any doors for me (at least that I could walk through with dignity and self-respect intact) and I have friends from all backgrounds who receive abuse based on their minority status, and they certainly do not have a victim mentality, rather they will stand and fight their ground. The fact that when we stand and fight our ground, some people listen, sticks in the craw of others. The OP also states that…
"You have the exact same rights and get the exact same pay as every straight white male out there. If you choose to work in a non-STEM field, don’t blame “patriarchy” for your lack of motivation and smaller paycheck."
This is horseshit of the highest degree. A man and a woman flipping burgers at McDonalds may get the same basic rate of pay, but as soon as you get into jobs with negotiated salaries, companies will offer men more money, it is a verifiable fact. Coupled with the fact that big business is seldom receptive to women in positions of authority and that sexual harassment in the workplace mostly goes only one way, shows that there is a distinct lack of regard or respect for women, regardless of how capable, motivated and ambitious they are.
To dismiss unfair and biased treatment against any group as them having ‘brought it on themselves’ cheapens us all, but that is what the OP is saying. Do you honestly agree that we all have an equal playing field in life? Or do you believe that systematically having some at more disadvantage than others is the best way to be? Sure you have some whiny kids on tumblr banging on about ‘Cis privelage’ or whatever, but the OP is saying that we, as minorities, all deserve the prejudice we face. Are you telling me that you are comfortable with that assertion?

regularlyschedulednegativity:

tamlynmac:

regularlyschedulednegativity:

the-unpopular-opinions:

SELF FULFILLING PROPHECY:

When you believe something will happen, and inadvertently bring about that outcome through your own actions.

SJWs: We’re oppressed!!!!!!!

Rest of the world: No, you’re not.

SJWs: You’re trying to downplay and derail our pain!!!!!!

Rest of the world: No, we’re not.

SJWs: You just plain hate us!!!!!!

Rest of the world: Yeah, I guess we do hate you now, since you can’t stop whining and flapping your gums about “systematic oppression” that doesn’t exist, and instead just suffer in silence like the rest of us. It’s called life. And life’s not fair. Get used to it.

SJWs: SEE?!?!?! YOU DO HATE US! WE WERE RIGHT!  WE ARE OPPRESSED!!!!!!!!!!!

You are not oppressed.

You are not “systematically” oppressed.

You’re hated for your stupid and whiny views, but you’re not oppressed.

You are not comparing apples and oranges when you say “men’s problems,” or “straight peoples’ problems,” etc are nothing compared to your own, and doing so doesn’t earn your “cause” any sympathy. Everyone’s problems deserve attention, great or small. You’ve got problems? Get in line! We’ve all got problems.

You live in a free society. You have the exact same rights and get the exact same pay as every straight white male out there. If you choose to work in a non-STEM field, don’t blame “patriarchy” for your lack of motivation and smaller paycheck. If you don’t get a job, don’t blame racism or sexism because you wrote a crappy resume.

In fact, employers are now afraid to hire the straight white male for fear of being labeled “discriminatory” for not hiring the gay hispanic female.

If anything, you have an ADVANTAGE by playing the race/gender/whatever discrimination card.

You don’t want to be treated the same as a straight white male. You want to be treated a whole lot better than him. You blame him for your problems, and don’t just want to be equal to him, but to bring him low, thinking you’re getting even for “years of systematic oppression.” You’re only going to hurt your cause in the end. You’re just too angry to admit it.

This is perfect. Only a fool would disagree with this post!

All I see is another whiny kid banging on about things he knows nothing about. If you had half a brain, you would understand why the minority card exists, and that is because certain people are reticent to be seen as engaging in the culture of double standards that it is prevalent. The fact that the minority card exists is enough to disprove your premise that there is no oppression.

Take for example the fact that women who get raped are often disbelieved as default or that women who are sexually harassed are frequently told to just ‘stop whining’ and take it as a joke/compliment/job opportunity. Women who endure sexual assaults are made to stand up in court and have their character pulled apart to see whether they were ‘asking for it’. Men in the same circumstances are not. Now, do women feel that a guy holding a door for them or offering to buy them a drink is in somehow a fair trade for this oppressive attitude towards women?  Is it bollocks!!!

It is the same with ethnicity. There are legitimate political organisations in this country who promote intolerance towards anyone who isn’t white and British. I grew up in an area where the word ‘Paki’ was the byword for anyone of Asian descent, with no regard for how degrading and offensive it was, where the idea of ‘Paki-bashing’ was considered a hilarious pastime, and where people thought it acceptable to harass any non-white person in the street because they were in the neighbourhood but not delivering food. I fail to see how a few laws that say you can’t discriminate against someone’s race or ethnicity somehow puts them in a position of privilege over white Brits

These laws that everyone cites as giving preference to minority groups in terms of employment are a ridiculous exaggeration of anti-discrimination legislation by people who are bitter that other groups of people might get a fair chance at a job, or fair representation in a court of law or in government. The same people who use the phrase ‘I’m not racist, but…’ are invariably the people who would rather see an all white house of commons and police force.

To say that oppression does not exist in our society is naive at best, dangerously revisionist at worst. Yes, the world gets a little better with each passing generation, but a few baby steps towards equality does not solve the problems of inherent bigotry in society.

We minority types aren’t looking to take over the world, all we want is the same level of respect and consideration as everybody else. Do we want special treatment ? No, we want EQUAL treatment. We want to be able to walk down the street without fear of being attacked for our race, ethnicity, sex or gender identity, the way that people who aren’t in minority groups can. We want to be able to go for a job interview or to patronise a business without someone taking one look at us and refusing to deal with us.

What we want is the same right to live unharassed, unmarginalised and unafraid of violence for who we are. And you know what? If we see or experience anything that contravenes those simple requests, then we will shout and scream and kick up a fuss, because just lying there and taking it doesn’t make it go away. The Suffragettes, The Civil Rights Movement, Stonewall… these groups have made huge differences in the lives of everyone in pushing for a fairer and more tolerant society. Please tell me why exactly you think some groups of people deserve to just lie there and get kicked more than others?

By denouncing someone just for speaking up for themselves in the face of injustice or abuse, all you are doing is siding with those who want the injustice or abuse to continue… the small minded and shallow hearted who wish to cling to their own privilege at the expense of everyone else out of some desperate attempt to feel naturally superior to someone. You want to stand up against double standards and inequality? Stop apologising for racists, mysogynists, homophobes, transphobes and xenophobes and pull your head out from your backside.

I have never been in a position where pulling my minority card would have been to my advantage, either legally or socially, yet I have been in many situations where my minority status has resulted in abuse, threats, public ridicule and denial of basic courtesies. The minority card won’t protect you when you are having the shit kicked out of you, or trying to win over a police officer or jury when you claim someone has attacked you. The minority card ultimately buys you nothing, and so I never play it, and most people in minorities feel the same way. We have a septic, venomous media that seeks to blame minority groups for the problems of the country, as opposed to the extravagances and incompetence of a tiny, super-rich, non-compassionate elite, and it works so well because people would rather take a second to hate, than ten seconds to learn and understand.

You’ve not properly read OP’s post. It doesn’t say there is no oppression, it says that the oppression is caused by whiny kids, the description of which matches your opening sentence. What minority groups seem to forget is that, yes, while they have the right to live unharnessed, so do I, and others like me. I have only to go on Tumblr for ten minutes before receiving abuse about my privilege from people who know nothing about me - if they did, they would know I do not have it easy in the slightest. Assumption is part of the problem. Don’t assume that my life is perfect. Don’t assume that I or any other white/cis/male have it easier than you. Your final statement actually summarises my point (not OPs - I can’t speak for anyone else)- “people would rather hate than learn to understand”.

Oh I have read it and I did not misunderstand. While there may be a few  obnoxious kids on Tumblr, it is hardly indicative of the real world where certain people face extensive obstacles they would not were they not of whatever minority status. To make out that kicking up a fuss about one’s treatment as a minority somehow makes one deserving of that treatment is a symptom of a sick society that I’m sure no one in their right mind would truly want to live in. The key to breaking a cycle of victim blaming and lashing out at one another is to not perpetuate it. I never assumed that your life is perfect. I never assume that of anybody, but the OP states that…

"If anything, you have an ADVANTAGE by playing the race/gender/whatever discrimination card."

Basically that minority status bestows great privilege, not on Tumblr, but in the real world. I live in the real world, and being trans has never opened any doors for me (at least that I could walk through with dignity and self-respect intact) and I have friends from all backgrounds who receive abuse based on their minority status, and they certainly do not have a victim mentality, rather they will stand and fight their ground. The fact that when we stand and fight our ground, some people listen, sticks in the craw of others. The OP also states that…

"You have the exact same rights and get the exact same pay as every straight white male out there. If you choose to work in a non-STEM field, don’t blame “patriarchy” for your lack of motivation and smaller paycheck."

This is horseshit of the highest degree. A man and a woman flipping burgers at McDonalds may get the same basic rate of pay, but as soon as you get into jobs with negotiated salaries, companies will offer men more money, it is a verifiable fact. Coupled with the fact that big business is seldom receptive to women in positions of authority and that sexual harassment in the workplace mostly goes only one way, shows that there is a distinct lack of regard or respect for women, regardless of how capable, motivated and ambitious they are.

To dismiss unfair and biased treatment against any group as them having ‘brought it on themselves’ cheapens us all, but that is what the OP is saying. Do you honestly agree that we all have an equal playing field in life? Or do you believe that systematically having some at more disadvantage than others is the best way to be? Sure you have some whiny kids on tumblr banging on about ‘Cis privelage’ or whatever, but the OP is saying that we, as minorities, all deserve the prejudice we face. Are you telling me that you are comfortable with that assertion?

Sorry Julie, but I really think you SHOULD double check your privelage after all!

Here is Julie’s article

http://www.spectator.co.uk/features/9141292/dont-you-dare-tell-me-to-check-my-privilege/

and here is my response.

Julie

Normally I am one for reasoned argument and debate, but since your attitude is standing in the way of fair and reasoned discourse, I feel justifed in calling you a fatuous fetid fucking bellend!
I am one of the biggest proponents of Feminism you could ever meet. It’s not because I’ve done the course, or read the books or burnt a bra or let my pubes grow into the shape and size of Terry Wogan’s toupee, but because I believe wholeheartedly in the absolute equality between all human beings, regardless of race, sex, gender identity, sexuality or favourite Star Trek Captain. I don’t subscribe to a specific ideology of feminism because I find them to be exclusionary even to other feminist ideas. Instead, I will stand up to any bigoted attitude I come up against to the best of my ability, and I devote myself to challenging preconceptions, and opposing victim blaming and ‘slut shaming’ wherever I encounter it.

You on the other hand very openly subscribe to an ideology where some people are more deserving of acknowledgment and respect than others, without letting little things like facts get in the way. So without further ado, I would consider it a Mitzvah to educate you a little on where your article seems to have fallen from your backside.

First off, comparing the challenges that western trans-people face, to the plight of women of more stone-age cultures is childish. Of course Transwomen in the UK aren’t subject to the same abysmal treatment as in places where women are subject to systematic rape, trafficking and mutilation to preserve a disgustingly patriarchal theocracy. However, did you give thought to consider how trans people in these cultures are treated? In most of these culture, Transgenderism and Transsexuality are viewed as general Homosexuality and the reaction tends to be brutal and fatal.

Third world women have it really shitty, but third world Trans people do too. Why don’t we just do what educated British white people love to do, and talk about our first world problems instead?

Now, your assertions are pretty off on what life is like for a British Transwoman. First off, HRT. Seriously, we’re on HRT from almost the start of our transition. Your assertion that it is a unique part of the ‘Cisgender experience’ is ignorant. I was 29 when I started HRT, and I know many others who started much younger than I. What percentage of Cis-women are on HRT from their 20s, or even their teens?

What about sexual harassment? You claim that all women will be on the receiving end of unwanted and aggressive sexual advances, but that Transwomen don’t have that problem. You may have the attitude that Transwomen are either truck drivers in a bad wig with a name like ‘Sparkle’ that no one wants to fuck, or heavily plastic surgeried ladyboy sex fiends who will suck anything you put in front of them. In fact Julie, most trans people I know look and act quite ‘normal’. Let me assure you that my treatment from amorous guys who DON’T clock me as trans is a lot more respectful than my treatment from those who do. You see Julie, we are so heavily portrayed as fetishists or sexual objects, that a certain subset of men feel as entitled to our bodies as they do to any other woman’s. However, with our perceived lower standing in society, there is much less effort made to charm us before it gets nasty and aggressive.

The assertion that we get all our ‘beautifucation’ surgeries on the NHS is bullshit. As wonderful as a Vagina is, I would hardly put its aesthetics high on a list of the pros of owning one. You wouldn’t mount it above the fireplace to admire for all time, it’d give the kids nightmares and make the dog run away.

We get the offer of GRS after a period of two to three years and that is pretty much it. Any other surgeries that we might possibly be elligible for on the NHS require a lot of grovelling and waiting to even get the most basic of feminising treatments. Even something as simple and vital to everyday life as hair removal is virtually impossible to get funding for, and we have to be living full time for nearly a year before we get any assistance in the very baseline form of hormones. Essentially, we are expected to spend the first few months of our lives as women, with NO physical help whatsoever, in a society that views us as little more than perverts, punchbags or punchlines.
Please tell me the last time a cisperson got beaten to death or driven to suicide by someone ripping them a new orifice over their gender identity? The issues and challenges that Transwomen face in our culture are either the same, or near identical issues to those that feminists have been fighting against for over a century. To abandon someone’s right to be taken seriously and treated respectfully as a woman just because of the genitals they were born with is an abomination of the principals of equality that women throughout the world have suffered and died for.

It is not up to YOU, Julie Burchill, to decide who IS and who ISN’T a man, or a woman, or a squirrel, or a houseplant, or a roll of duct tape. You, and other self righteous, dogmatic evangelists of all doctrines, ideologies and theologies, do not get to decide MY identity, and there are plenty of people out there much better qualified to voice their opinion on the matter than you are.

You want to stand against glass ceilings, FGM, sex trafficking, rape culture, victim blaming, slut shaming and double standards, then I will stand right beside you propping up the other side of the banner, but when you turn on a subset of vulnerable women and treat us like imposters and fantasists, we will show you up for the hypocritical twat that you are.

Tamz